Oxygen Mask Rule of Financial Planning
Why helping your children may start with securing your own financial future
One of the questions I've been asked often throughout my career is:
"How much should I be saving for my child's college?"
It's a wonderful question.
It comes from a place of love, responsibility, and wanting to give your children every opportunity possible.
But over the years, I've noticed something that concerns me.
Many of the parents asking me about college savings haven't yet taken the necessary steps to secure their own financial future.
This isn't selfishness.
It's human nature.
As parents, we're wired to put our children first. We sacrifice our time, our sleep, our careers, and often our financial security because we want to create a better life for them.
But when it comes to financial planning, I often encourage families to think about the safety demonstration we hear every time we board an airplane.
"In the event of an emergency, place your own oxygen mask on first before assisting others."
Financial planning works much the same way.
Why Retirement Often Comes Before College Savings
Many parents are surprised when I tell them that retirement often deserves a higher priority than saving for college.
Here's why.
Your children can borrow money for college.
You cannot borrow money for retirement.
While student loans certainly aren't ideal, there are scholarships, grants, work-study programs, community colleges, employer tuition assistance programs, and various repayment options available.
Federal Student Aid, U.S. Department of Education — https://studentaid.gov
There is no retirement loan.
If you reach your 60s or 70s without sufficient savings, your options become much more limited.
And perhaps the greatest gift you can give your children isn't paying every dollar of their college education.
It's helping ensure they don't have to financially support you later in life.
Unfortunately, retirement readiness remains a challenge for many Americans. Research from the Federal Reserve Bank of Minneapolis (Saving for Retirement in America) and the Federal Reserve's Survey of Consumer Finances has found that many Americans may not be saving enough to maintain their desired lifestyle in retirement and that many households approach retirement with balances below what they expect they will need. https://www.minneapolisfed.org/article/2025/saving-for-retirement-in-america
https://www.federalreserve.gov/econres/scfindex.htm
As difficult as it can be emotionally, protecting your own retirement is often one of the most loving financial decisions you can make for your family.
When College Savings Makes Sense
Once you've established a strong financial foundation, education planning can become an excellent next step.
That foundation may include:
Maintaining an emergency fund
Paying down high-interest debt
Saving consistently toward retirement
Having appropriate insurance protection
Living comfortably within your means
Once those pieces are in place, we can begin exploring the best ways to help fund your child's education.
Understanding 529 Plans
For many families, a 529 College Savings Plan remains one of the most effective education savings tools available.
Source: https://www.investor.gov/introduction-investing/general-resources/news-alerts/alerts-bulletins/investor-bulletins/introduction-529-plans
Some of the potential advantages include:
Tax-free growth when used for qualified education expenses
Potential state tax benefits depending on your state of residence
High contribution limits
The ability to change beneficiaries under certain circumstances
Additional flexibility that has been added through recent legislation
Like every financial tool, however, there are tradeoffs.
529 plans are designed specifically for education. While the rules have become more flexible over the years, using the money for non-qualified expenses may result in taxes and penalties on earnings. In some situations, a taxable investment account may provide greater flexibility depending on a family's goals and circumstances.
This is one reason why there is rarely a one-size-fits-all answer.
College Can Still Be a Valuable Investment
It's also important not to confuse my message with "college isn't worth it."
For many individuals, higher education can provide meaningful long-term financial and career benefits.
Research consistently shows that workers with bachelor's degrees tend to earn more over their careers than workers whose education ended with high school, although outcomes vary significantly by field of study, occupation, geographic location, and individual circumstances.
Source: https://www.aplu.org/our-work/4-policy-and-advocacy/publicuvalues/employment-earnings/
The goal isn't avoiding education.
The goal is helping families pay for it in a way that doesn't jeopardize their own long-term financial security.
My Own Experience With College Funding
This conversation is personal for me because I wasn't one of the students whose college education was fully paid for by my parents.
Like many families, we pieced it together.
I utilized a combination of student loans, grants, scholarships, and my own efforts to fund my education.
At times, I felt a little behind some of my friends whose parents were able to cover most or all of their college expenses. It's natural to compare yourself when you're young, and there were certainly moments when I wished my path had been easier.
But looking back, I also recognize that the experience taught me lessons that have served me throughout my life and career.
Because I knew I would be responsible for repaying those loans, I took the financial side of college very seriously. I wasn't signing paperwork blindly. My parents and school advisors spent time helping me understand how student loans worked, what I was borrowing, what the repayment obligations would be, and how those decisions could impact my future.
That education was incredibly valuable.
In many ways, the conversations we had about borrowing, responsibility, and long-term financial planning were just as important as the degree itself.
This is one of the reasons I encourage parents to involve their children in the college funding discussion. Whether you're able to pay for all of college, part of it, or none of it, there is an opportunity to teach financial literacy, decision-making, and personal responsibility along the way.
Those lessons can last a lifetime.
The goal isn't necessarily to ensure your child never has to contribute to the cost of their education.
The goal is to help them understand the value of that education, the financial implications of the choices they make, and how to make informed decisions about their future.
Sometimes the greatest gift isn't removing every financial obstacle.
Sometimes it's teaching someone how to navigate them responsibly.
A New Option: Trump Accounts
Beginning this year, another planning opportunity has entered the conversation: Trump Accounts.
These accounts were created as part of recently enacted legislation and are designed to encourage long-term investing for eligible children.
Source: https://www.irs.gov/trumpaccounts
Depending on eligibility requirements and future guidance, certain children may qualify for an initial government-funded contribution, while families may also be able to make additional contributions subject to applicable rules and limits.
As with any new financial program, details may continue to evolve as regulatory guidance is released.
Like 529 plans, these accounts have specific rules regarding eligibility, contributions, investments, distributions, and taxation. They are not necessarily better or worse than existing education savings strategies. Rather, they represent another planning tool that may be appropriate for some families depending on their goals and overall financial situation.
Before opening any account, it is important to understand how it fits into your broader financial plan.
Having the Conversation Matters
Perhaps the most overlooked part of this entire process is communication.
Talking openly with your children about:
The cost of college
What you can realistically contribute
The importance of financial responsibility
The role of borrowing, if necessary
The long-term impact of financial decisions
can help set expectations early and reduce stress later.
It can also create opportunities to teach valuable lessons about budgeting, decision-making, delayed gratification, and personal responsibility.
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, financial planning isn't just about numbers.
It's about creating a life where you—and your family—have options.
Where you're not forced into difficult decisions because of financial pressure.
Where your children can pursue opportunities without carrying the weight of supporting you later.
And where you can enjoy the years you've worked so hard to build toward.
College savings is important.
But financial independence is foundational.
When I speak with parents about education planning, I often remind them that helping their children and helping themselves are not competing goals.
In many cases, they are one and the same.
By building a solid financial foundation, planning thoughtfully, and having honest conversations about money, you can create opportunities for your children while also protecting your own future.
And that may be one of the greatest gifts you ever give them.
Oleada Financial provides advisory services through Rossby Financial LLC, a Registered Investment Advisor. Rossby Financial LLC does not provide tax or legal advice.
This content is for informational purposes only and should not be construed as investment, tax, or legal advice. Investing involves risk, including possible loss of principal.
